Seattle, WA – Primarily known in the office as the guy that no one has actually heard speak, Dinesh Kampur’s coworkers remain shocked by how much enthusiasm he displays in his emails, with a noted over-abundance in exclamation points. Kampur is widely renowned in the office for his incredibly low energy, to the point that paramedics have been called into the office twice to check if he was still alive.
“In my six years working with Dinesh, the most I’ve ever heard come out of his mouth is a muffled grunt after I rolled my chair over his foot,” stated Dan McCord. “I once tried to ask him about his family, and it took me five minutes to realize he was sleeping with his eyes open.
“But man, you should see the thank you emails he sends when someone brings in donuts. It’s more exclamation points than consonants.”