Zoned-Out Coworker Spends Entire Meeting Wondering If He Can Grow Neckbeard All The Way To His Pubes

Fort Lauderdale, FL – As he took his customary position seated next to the exit while staring at the tile floor in front of him, office manager Steve Zdryko contemplated how long it would take to grow his neckbeard enough so that it would eventually reach his untrimmed crotch hair. According to Zdryko, he uses meetings as a time to let his mind focus on man’s unanswerable questions, such as which member of the undefeated 1972 Miami Dolphins team would have made the best U.S. president, or if he could grow his toenails long enough to scratch his ear.

Related: Finance Manager Unsure How To Casually Bring Up Shaving His Chest Over The Weekend

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