El Paso, TX – After pushing down her natural reaction to slap her boss across the face and instead letting out a clearly forced laugh, Sonya Patterson declined Jeremy Elliott’s offer to show her “how a real man would make (her) feel in the bedroom.” The unnecessarily polite rebuttal marks the 600th consecutive day that Patterson has had to turn down Elliott’s lurid remarks, including over a dozen times that he offered to replace her desk chair with his face, and over 50 instances of Elliott asking her if she “needed a hand” whenever she left to go to the bathroom.
Patterson, who spends 15 minutes every morning before work sitting in her car and mentally preparing herself for whatever incredibly disgusting thing her boss will suggest she perform on him while high-fiving her coworkers, has learned to take the lewd behavior in stride.
“Of course I would prefer if Jeremy didn’t constantly offer to give me a ride on his seatless bicycle, but I saw what happened when Christina (Porter) told him off,” explained Patterson. “If a woman stands up for herself once in this office, she gets labeled as a ‘stuffy bitch’ that doesn’t know how to have fun.”
Despite the near-constant sexual harassment, Patterson says that, overall, she enjoys her job working for the Republican National Committee.