Out Of Office Email Most Thorough Communication Man Has Ever Written

Jacksonville, FL – Known around the office for using as little communication as possible in emails, coworkers were shocked by Greg Emmelson’s cogent, detailed out of office message that clearly explained what to do during his vacation. Emmelson had earned a reputation for sending short emails less than a sentence long filled with auto-corrected grammatical errors from his iPhone, oftentimes responding to emails by simply saying, “no ducking way.”

When Emmelson was asked to improve his grammar, he simply replaced almost all of his communication with emojis. Prior to his departure, Emmelson’s last email was simply a row of puking face emojis in response to a contract request from one of his clients.

Linda Schroeder, Emmelson’s manager, remains stunned by his eloquent out of office message and hopes that he continues to utilize a high-school vocabulary when he returns from vacation.

“Honestly, I was starting to think that Greg never learned how to read or write, or maybe English isn’t his first language, and he was raised using hieroglyphics,” commented Schroeder. “To find out that he can not only write coherently, but also correctly use ‘they’re’ and ‘their’, is a revelation.

“Turns out there’s hope for all of us.”

Related: Office Hero Boldly Responds to Email While on Vacation

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