Mobile, AL – Employees at lighthouse statue retailer Ocean Memories were noticeably uncomfortable after Dan Henderson placed a personal photo on his desk that shows him tightly embracing his pregnant sister Kellyanne, who, according to her Facebook page, is not in a relationship. After further Facebook research, Henderson’s coworker Jesse Williams found that she hasn’t been in a relationship in eight months, and her last post six months ago said she was “blessed to spend so much time with the best brother in the whole world”. Williams promptly shut off his computer and proceeded to throw it off the top deck of the parking garage.
Despite Williams’ uncomfortable revelation, Henderson’s coworkers continued to dig deeper into Henderson’s relationship with his sister.
That’s clearly her left hand on top of her belly, which means that Danny’s hand is right under…her…oh god,” realized Ashlee Mendoza, who proceeded to dry-heave before running to the bathroom. When asked for further comment, Mendoza said, “that photo needs to be burned before Jesus finds out about it.”
Andy Leibowitz, Henderson’s manager, recognized that the photo was taken outside the lakehouse that he let Henderson stay at the previous weekend.
“That’s so weird, Danny said he wanted to take someone special up there for the weekend, but…,” stopped Leibowitz as a horrified realization came to light. After returning from an hour-long walk to clear his head, Leibowitz declared that he would be selling the house immediately.