CEO Ousted After 3,495th Sexual Harassment Accusation

New York, NY – Rich Copeland, CEO of Roozzy, was forced to resign from his position after another sexual harassment accusation, this time from the office custodian, was brought against him.  The charge marks the 3,474th time that Copeland has been accused of predatory behavior towards women.  In addition, Copeland faces 17 charges from men and four more regarding inappropriate touching of employees’ pets, all specifically coming from toy dog breeds.

“We take sexual harassment accusations seriously,” state Roozzy chief counsel Levi Ortiz.  “The first 3,494 accusations opened our eyes to Mr. Copeland’s behavior, and after the 3,495th one, we knew it was time to take action.”

Ortiz also defended Roozzy’s decision to not take action until now, saying that “it would have been unfair to Rich if we had just listened to gossip, wave after wave of hearsay, corroborated stories, and inappropriate comments and emails that were forwarded to us that accidentally got caught in spam filters.  But once Rich’s actions ended up trending on Twitter, something had to be done.

As part of his termination, Copeland stands to receive a mere fraction of his severance payment at only $50 million, or roughly 250,000 times what his accusers will receive.

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