Fesno, CA – Gale Bateman, sales coordinator at Polyore, was given a critical project to walk into every conference room in the office and tally how many ceiling room tiles each room had. Albert Perrera, Bateman’s manager, said that phase two would then involve adding all of those tiles up so that they would then know the total for the entire office. He expects phase two to start in six to eight weeks, noting that while there are only five conference rooms, two are “decently sized” and one is “just massive”.
Perrera has discussed the project with the rest of the team and informed them that under no circumstances should they interrupt Bateman’s tile counting, and that they may be required to work overtime because of it.
“This definitely isn’t busy work,” Perrera declared. “While Gale struggles with almost all of her actual work, I’ve found her able to go above and beyond for unique projects like this. Last quarter she did a phenomenal job of evaluating which carwash did the best job detailing my car.”
While Perrera refused to explain why he chose to focus Bateman on menial tasks instead of disciplining her or firing her, an unnamed source on the team implied that the two are sleeping together. The source made obvious winking and kissy faces while repeatedly pushing her right index finger through a circle formed from her left index finger and thumb.
After Bateman finishes both phases of “Project Sesame Street”, he plans on tasking Bateman with browsing Craigslist for a new sectional sofa that will “spruce up the apartment”.